It’s in the wind, the ocean, and the trees…the unsettling little upstart is everywhere. Change often puts the fear into me, fear that can only be matched when I feel something moving in my shoe when I slip it on here in Bali, normally it’s just a small frog by the way.
We can feel change coming cant we? One day you’re shuffling along just wonderfully, in the flow, thoughts are quality, relationships connected nice and deep and you have this kind of untouchable swagger that separates you from the crowed…then out of nowhere life pops up and says ‘alright cowboy, enough of the smooth ride’ its time for some change again’.
Yeah, well this happened to me not so long ago (And many times before) and I’ll be transparent with you, as I love to write with vulnerability and authenticity. This has been a year which has tested my strength, my character, depth of self worth and ability to trust that for every step that I take into the unknown the ground will reveal itself for me to stand on. I’m seated here in a jungle, smoking a great cigar, letting go and allowing myself to be who I really am, not who I think I should be, as this false ideal is getting in my way. Perhaps, by writing what is truth, instead of social media pictures of my good moments, someone will read this and think, hell yes; that’s me too!
We can try avoid these times of change, immerse ourselves in work, drink (I’m good at this), we can immerse ourselves in lovers (good at this too)change-architect-sign1 and the infinite other ways we can avoid the real thing that’s going on which is we’re changing because we need to, because we must!
It can be viewed as simple as this; the old version of you cannot serve your purpose anymore. You’re being challenged to step into the space of the person who is capable. Here’s where I’m going to share with you a way to get through the more challenging times, as this helped me when I recognized that the way I was dealing with it was detrimental to my happiness. When the going got tough I forgot what actually set me free.
I started focusing on abundance, my circumstances, on not contributing as well as I would have liked and that all of a sudden I didn’t have the freedom I desired. I was really focusing on the external world; I was focusing on the outside in. I was focusing on what was wrong and what I didn’t have. During these times of change I discovered that I had got myself out of alignment with my values. For example, perhaps my values were Freedom, Abundance, Happiness and Contributing. And to feel like I didn’t have these sent me down a slow path of losing myself. I was falling into the pattern of thinking ‘when’ I have these mentioned values I’ll be happy, so I need to get them again.
When going through change I was forgetting (via pain or sadness) to show up as who I really am, the truest version of myself. I needed to focus back inside and feel that love for myself, to feel safe again, to feel that sense of self worth and confidence in my abilities. Once these were again at a healthy level I organically felt aligned to my values. Lets look at it another way.
If you had Freedom, Abundance, Happiness and could Contribute…what would be the result? Yes…feeling safe, a healthy sense of self worth, confident in your abilities, love and an authentic ability to contribute. So start with the inside out, don’t focus externally, get super present, listen to your feelings based on how you feel, right now, without any triggers from the past. Work…from the inside out. Your external world is a reflection of your internal.
When your feeling out of sorts, when change is coming and you know you’re going to go through it to get to it, when you know there is no stopping this one at the gate. Check in with your values and make sure they’re aligned with what’s happening internally for you. Don’t look to the outside world for your answers, as the answer is not out there. The answers, as they have been all along, are buried within you.